I thought about putting on panty hose this morning but firmly decided against it. Here are the top ten reasons I hate wearing panty hose:
1. I can’t breathe.
2. Men don’t have to wear them.
3. I would rather show off my hairy legs.
4. I can’t enjoy my dessert without getting a tummy ache.
5. They’re artificial.
6. They always run.
7. They're bad for the environment (I made that up, but I'm sure it's true).
8. They’re too old fashion.
9. My kids would rather use them for Halloween masks.
10. They make me sweat in places we should not discuss on a PG-13 blog.
Does anyone out there actually like to wear panty hose? Let’s unite and ban them altogether.