Marketing 101: Know Yourself. Be Yourself. Stop Whining.

How do you best market yourself as a writer (and a person)?

In one short post, I’m going to share my playbook.  I’m linking up with Rachelle Gardner and my fellow colleagues at WordServe Literary to give away some unsolicited marketing secrets.

Don’t read this post if you are looking for a shortcut to building a platform.  I don’t have one.  And please don’t read this if you’re looking for time-saving secrets on social media, online communities, or networking with other bloggers.  Sorry.  I don’t have easy answers.  While I engage in all of these strategies, I’d like to share a different perspective.

Know yourself.  Be yourself.  Stop whining.

1)  Know Yourself.

You want practical advice, not a soap box.  Right?  I get it.  So here’s how “knowing myself” has worked so far.

First, I know my limitations.  I have no time to waste.  I’m a too-busy lawyer with three small kids and a husband who already thinks I’m stretched 100 ways too many.  Does this stop me?  Of course not.  I just have to make choices. 

• I shoot for quality, not quantity.  I choose to connect with other writers and readers that are like-minded – people who inspire and sharpen me, regardless of what they can “do” for me.  And while I’m not making the biggest splash around, it’s been incredibility meaningful.  Meaning motivates me.
• I hang out on Twitter because it’s fun and efficient.  Of all the social media vehicles, I like Twitter the best.  It’s fast, fun, and incredibly efficient.  I’ve been on Twitter for less than a year, and it’s hands down driven more traffic to my blog than any other source. 
• I’ve joined one online community, and I’m committed.  About a year ago, I joined The High Calling as a contributing editor.  I guess you could say it’s part of my marketing plan, but that’s not why I do it.  I feel at home there.  It’s a place I’d hang out even if I bagged the whole writing scene.  
• I’m in it for the long haul.  There’s no quick fix.  I know that my personal platform is going to happen brick by brick.  I’m not looking for quick results, just measurable progress over time. 

2)  Be Yourself. 

Now, you may wonder what this has to do with marketing.  Stick with me, it’s a fair question.

When I was a young trial lawyer, an old pro pulled me aside (come to think of it, I think he smacked me over the head) and gave me some key advice.

“Always be yourself in front of the jury.  If you act fake, they can see right through it.”

Pretty good, huh?

I happen to think readers are a lot like jurors.  So in this world of marketing madness on steroids, I’ve decided to just be me.  I just can’t fake the whole networking thing.  If I went around leaving random comments on blogs that said, “Please follow me and I’ll follow you back” I think I would shoot myself.  (I don’t do auto messages either.)

The good news?  If I’m networking with you, it means I actually like you.  I'm not faking it.

Besides, being myself is the one thing I can do better than anybody else.  (You probably have that same gift.)

3)  Quit Whining.

Writers love to whine (present company especially included).  We have it so hard, don’t we?

Lisa doesn’t work outside her home.  Of course, she has all the time in the world to market and network.

Terry developed a platform because he has a big endorser.  It must be nice.  I don’t know anyone important.

Marketing isn’t what I signed up for.  I just want to write, ok? 

I’m an artist!  Marketing is beneath me.

Excuses, excuses.  Does this sound familiar?

Look, we all know that marketing doesn’t drive us to write.  Writing drives us to market.   You may think marketing is just a necessary evil (or just plain evil) but if you are passionate about getting your message out to other people, you’re going to have to sell yourself to an audience. 

So stop whining and get to work!

Yeah, the work involves things like blogging and networking – the things I already told you I haven’t mastered.  But if you set your mindset first – know yourself, be yourself, and quit whining – it might not be as tough as you think.

It’s actually tougher!

[If you care to continue the discussion on all things writing, please join me and my WordServe colleagues daily at the WordServe Water Cooler.  I'm thrilled to be part of this newly-launched community of talented writers.]

Stepping Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Yesterday, I received a really great email.  It was from a woman I had just met.  A woman who had just picked up a copy of Chasing Superwoman.

“Wow, I just read the first 20 pages and even though I don’t have small children and am not particularly religious, your writing is still talking to me!”

Why did this email mean so much? 

Here’s the quick background. 

This week, I attended a conference of women lawyers and spoke about Chasing Superwoman.  And I was pretty nervous.  What would my peers (and my client!) think about me when I opened up my soul?  Would they think I was too religious?  Even a Jesus freak?

For the record, women lawyers are a tough group.  (I know, I’m one of them.)  Which is why I was a little scared to share my story.  In fact, the woman who sent me the email told me straight up that she was initially reluctant to open my book – yeah, it seemed a little too “religious.”  (I was more than thrilled when she went on to say she didn’t find my writing to be preachy or judgmental – so she kept reading!)

Stepping out of your comfort zone usually involves some risk.  Even some uncertainty.  There’s no guarantee people will respond the way you want them to.  In fact, every time I put myself “out there” I usually have a few second thoughts.

Why don’t I just play it safe?  Why do I have to push the envelope?  What if it backfires?

I still have a lot to learn about stepping out of my comfort zone.  But one thing’s for sure.  It keeps life interesting, doesn’t it? 

In this case, I even made a new friend.

Join Me To Support Breast Cancer Research Today At Huffman’s Market

The books are ready.

My mother's sauce is cooking (click here for the recipe).

The gift bags are being prepared.

Yeah, and we also have a few surprises up our sleeves! 

But that’s not the best news. 

The best news is that 100% of the proceeds from book sales at Huffman’s Market today will go to support breast cancer research!

This October marks the 26th anniversary of National Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  And Tim and Glenda Huffman, together with Chasing Superwoman, are passionate about raising awareness and finding a cure!

It’s not about the books.  It’s not about the sauce.  It’s not about the olive oil or the wine.  It’s not even about the ice cream for kids.

Sure, we’re going to have lots of fun.  But we’re coming together for a bigger purpose!

So join me today at Huffman’s Market from 3:00 to 6:30 p.m.

What about those of you who are out of town?  Well, you’re part of this event too.  In fact, anyone who posts a comment on the blog between now and 6:00 a.m. Monday morning will be eligible for a drawing to win a copy of Chasing Superwoman or a gift from Huffman’s Market.  (Just make sure you indicate in your comment whether you would like to be in the drawing for the “book” or the “gift.")

See you later today.  We’ll be posting updates on Twitter throughout the evening!

Join Me For Family Meal Night At Huffman’s Market!

Do you ever have a hard time getting a family meal on the table?  Are you tired of your kids eating junk?  Do you get home from work and wonder, What am I going to feed everyone for dinner?

You’re not alone.

Today, at Working Mommy Wednesday, we’re answering the question:  “You know you’re a working mom when….”

In my world, I know I’m a working mom because I just can’t seem to get my act together to make everyone a healthy dinner.  And food is important to me.  I mean really important.

I grew up in a family that ate meals together.  Every night.  We weren’t allowed to miss dinner – but even more importantly, we didn’t want to miss dinner.  Dinner was sacred.

Besides the fact that we all loved my mother’s cooking, we also loved being together.  Family meals helped us connect and reconnect.  And the dinner table was always filled with drama and laughter.

So what’s a modern family to do?  Most moms today – whether or not they work outside the home – can’t spend hours during the week planning and preparing family meals.  And bulk cooking is great if you have the time, but sometimes I just can’t squeeze another minute out of my schedule.

The answer?  Chasing Superwoman and Huffman’s Family Meal Night!

Let me explain.  I’m teaming up with my neighbors, Tim and Glenda Huffman, to support the Ohio Grocer Association Parents’ Week at the Huffman’s Market.   (For those of you who live out of town, Huffman’s is our locally owned and operated grocery store.  And among other things, they specialize in affordable, nutritious, pre-made family meals.)

On Friday, October 1 from 3:00 to 6:30 p.m., we’ll be celebrating food, wine, and books at the Huffman’s Market.  I’ll be signing books, AND I’ll be making my mother’s homemade sauce (some of you have seen the recipe in the back of my book).

Most importantly, we’ll be having lots of fun.  I just can’t wait for this event!   Some of you know that my neighbors are a pretty wild bunch, so we’ll have lots of blogs to post and tweets to share.

What about my online friends who can’t come to the event?  Don’t worry, we’ll be doing something extra special on the blog for you next Friday.  So please come back on October 1!

Now, I have to get busy buying the ingredients for my sauce….

Radical: Chapter One

What am I doing posting on a Tuesday?  Didn’t I decide to cut back blogging to three days a week?

Good question.

Here’s the answer.  Today’s post is devoted to an online book club I’ve joined with almost 200 other readers.

The book?  Radical: Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream.

Does the title scare you?  It scares me.  A lot.

I really don’t know why I got into this book club right now.  It’s not like I need more to do.  It’s not like I don’t have enough to read.  And what’s wrong with the American dream anyway?

Let’s just say the first chapter lived up to the title.

In Chapter One, author David Platt challenges our spiritual presuppositions that “bigger is better.”  He points out, for example, that Jesus probably would have failed Marketing 101.  Case in point:  Jesus only had 120 followers at the end of his ministry.  And when new recruits inquired about joining him, he didn’t say, “come along for a fun ride” or “give me a trial run and you won’t be disappointed.” 

Instead, he said things like, “sell all your possessions” and “leave your homes.”  Some would say that he actually tried to talk people out of following him.

Obviously, the Christian church has grown leaps and bounds since those first 120 recruits.  But maybe, just maybe, those of us who claim to follow Jesus need to ask ourselves, who are we really following?

As Pratt asks, have we invented “[a] nice, middle-class, American Jesus?” (p.13)

Pratt goes so far as to say that maybe we’re not worshipping Jesus at all:

“We are molding Jesus into our image.  He is beginning to look a lot like us because, after all, that is who we are most comfortable with.  And the danger now is that when we gather in our church buildings to sing and lift up our hands in worship, we may not actually be worshipping the Jesus of the Bible.  Instead we may be worshipping ourselves.”  (Ibid.)

Ouch!

Want to join me next week for Chapter Two?

Chasing Superwoman Give-Away At Graceful

There are lots of reasons to check out Michelle DeRusha's blog, Graceful.   Michelle's writing is insightful, authentic, and spiritual.  And she even posts her own lovely photographs (none of that clip art stuff I get off the internet)!  I've been reading Graceful for over six months, and I'm hooked.

In addition, check out the Chasing Superwoman give-away on Michelle's blog today!  Michelle was one of my first friends in "blogging land" and she's supported me through this book launch every step of the way. (Rumor has it, she's going to teach me how to use Twitter next!)

Thanks, Michelle, for your writing and your friendship.   Have a good weekend all, and happy reading!

Putting June In Perspective

Can you believe July 1 is here?  Is it just me, or did June fly by?

June 2010 was a busy month.  And I wouldn’t trade the last 30 days for anything. 

I’m one of those people who needs to slow down sometimes and remember.

To catch my breath.

To pray.

To make a record, before it passes me by.

So, here are 10 highlights I don’t want to forget. 

1.  Launching Chasing Superwoman.  I thought June 1 would never come.  Then, it hit me like a ton of bricks.  No, I wasn’t ready!  But I’m not sure I’d ever be truly ready.

2.  Guest-blogging at Graceful and Rants and Ramblings.  I’ve gotten to guest blog at some of my favorite sites.  (Yeah, I posted at Graceful in May, but it set the stage for June!)

3.  Launching the on-line book club at Light The World.  Ann Wurster and her team at Light The World get all the credit for this!  We launch discussion the week of July 11 (there's still time to register).

4.  Publishing an article with InterVarsity’s The Well.  My neighbor, Kelly Monroe, (author of Finding God at Harvard) hooked me up with editor Marcia Bosscher.  I’m thrilled to publish an article with this amazing group of women.

5.  Meeting radio friends across the US.  Thanks to my friends at B&B Media Group, I’ve done radio interviews in Florida, Ohio, North Carolina, Texas, New Mexico, and New York.  And there are more to come!

6.  TV Interview with Mike Jackson.  This was perhaps the most unnerving moment of the month.  Thanks much to Mike Jackson and the team at NBC Channel 4 for all of their support. 

7.  Interview with Laura Groves, at Outnumbered Mom.  Laura is a kindred spirit – a working mom and mother of four boys!  Stay tuned for her book, I’m Outnumbered, launching in August (available for pre-order on Amazon).

8.  Newspaper article and interview with the Canton Repository.  My home-town paper, the Canton Repository, gave a great review to Chasing Superwoman in it’s Sunday book reviews.

9.  Book signing at Borders.  Doug and the kids (along with family and friends) helped me launch my first book-signing at Borders in Canton.  (We’ll do another signing at Borders in Columbus, on July 11.)

10. My first Amazon review.  It’s always fun – and rewarding – to receive positive feedback.  I was more than thrilled when my first Amazon review was posted at 5 stars!  

Overall, June 2010 has been a month to remember.

Ok, I lied!  I couldn’t limit it to 10.  The last 30 days would not be complete without the relationships -- the new friends I’ve met and the old friends (and family) who have encouraged me every step of the way. 

Thanks for a great month – I wouldn’t want to share it with anyone else!

Is anyone else tired?  Yeah, I’d still do it all over again.

Tuesday Tip: Dealing With Negative Feedback

If you write (and you decide to go public), you’re going to get your share of reactions.  Some of them will be good.  And, as I’ve recently learned, some of them will be not so good.

Most of us are pretty good at dealing with positive feedback.  But negative feedback?  Not so much.  As much as we say it doesn’t matter, negative comments always hurt – especially when they’re personal.

So, from a first-time author who’s only had one book released for a month, here are 10 tips I’ve learned so far.

1.  It goes with the territory.  If you are going to write a book, expect it.  No one is exempt from criticism.  (And, if people are talking about your book, at least they’re reading it!)

2.  Consider the source.  Who is making the comment?  Is it a random blogger who doesn’t even have an identifiable profile?  Is it someone outside your target audience?  Or, is it a credible voice in the writing community, or a leader from an audience you intend to reach?

3.  Don’t strike back.  As tempting as it is to respond to every comment, don’t.  In most cases, it’s not worth trying to “set the record straight.”  Especially if the attacks are personal, resist the temptation to join the mud-slinging.

4.  Learn from it.  Is the comment valid?  Does it present a common message or theme?  If so, you can become a better person (and a better writer) by taking the comment to heart. 

5.  Seek wisdom.  Talk to the friends and colleagues you respect in the writing community.  After all, when you’re in the midst of receiving criticism, it’s hard to be objective.  Sometimes, you need a lens.  In my case, I went to Rachelle Gardner, who gave me some great insights, as well as some helpful posts.

6.  Seek support.  In addition to seeking wisdom from those in the writing world, we all need our family and friends – especially those outside the writing world – to keep us sane.  My niece, Laura, wrote me a prayer last week that I will hold dear forever.  And my girlfriends will gladly take my side on just about anything!

7.  Don’t take it personally.  Usually, those criticizing you don’t know you.  Take the constructive feedback, and leave the personal attacks at the door.  And, as several wise friends have reminded me, God alone knows your heart. 

8.  Find the silver lining. I was putting my 9-year-old son, Nick, to bed last week, and I told him that a few women who read the book had attacked my busy lifestyle—questioning whether I could really be a good mother.  He said, “wow, that’s really mean.”  But then he said, “I think they are giving you a compliment.  What they’re really saying is that they know they have it easier than you.”  (See Romans 8:28.)

9.  You can’t please everyone.  Everyone isn’t going to like your book.  Everyone isn’t going to like you.  As writers, our goal in life should not be to please everyone.  Can you think of a single writer you respect who has both intended and succeeded to be a universal people pleaser?  Even if it you wanted to achieve this goal, it’s not possible.

10.  Numbers 1-9 are easier said than done.  As much as my head knows that the above tips are true, my heart still wants to wallow in self-protection and even a little pity.  I know full well that I can only respond to criticism through the grace of God – with much patience, prayer, and practice.  The fact is, I’m not very good at it, but I’m getting better. 

Please help me refine my tips -- I have a feeling I’m going to get to practice these tips over and over again!

How do you deal with negative feedback?

(After writing this post, I continued to find more helpful tips -- such as a post by Laura Boggess, Wanted:  Friendly Reader, at High Calling Blogs.)

Lessons From TV Debut - Pray First!

Have you ever been so excited that you forgot to pray? I almost learned that lesson from my TV interview on Channel 4, our local NBC affiliate.

The morning of the interview, I was really nervous. What are you supposed to wear on TV? I went to put on a red blazer and Doug remarked, “That’s too bright, you better wear something else.”

Thanks honey for all the helpful input.

I opted for a plain black dress. Rather than staining my teeth with more coffee, I got out the whitening strips from my dentist. What we do for vanity.

It was raining, which meant my hair would transform into a ball of frizz the moment I stepped outside. This called for extra hair gel. I caked it on liberally, along with some extra make-up. After whining my teeth, I decided to make a green shake for breakfast. If I didn’t have my usual dose of caffeine, at least I would have energy.

When I got to my office, I was really missing my coffee. I went into the bathroom and noticed I had hair gel all over the side of my dress. Worse yet, I had spinach in my teeth from the green shake. So much for vanity.

I called my friend Cheryl, and she prayed for me over the phone. Then I called my secretary, Larriane. “Help, I need some coffee. I don’t care if my teeth are brown, I need some caffeine quick.”

After getting some work done (and some coffee), I headed to the studio around 11:00 a.m. From there forward, everything went smoothly. The team at Channel 4 was fantastic, and they even posted the link to my book on their website.

Of course, after an interview there are always things you wish you had done differently – things you wish you would have known (like where the camera was) and things you wish you would have said. When I got home, my kids were thrilled to see me, but Abby blurted out -- “You should have said our names on TV!”

Next time, I’ll try to remember to say their names. The most important lesson I learned? It wasn't the coffee, the hair gel, or the whitening strips. The most important lesson was to pray first!

Have a good weekend!

Too Busy For A Book Club?

I haven’t been in a book club for about 10 years.  It’s not that I’m not interested.  I just don’t have the time.  I’m what you call a book club drop out. 

Sure, we all make time for the things that are important.  And I still make time to read.  But at the end of my work day, the last thing I really want to do is spend more time away from home.  And at this stage in my life, the weekends are reserved completely for my family.

Here’s the problem.  I still miss being in a book club.  I know I’m really missing out on some great books, great friends, and great discussion.  And I also know there are many moms out there who feel the same way.  We hate to miss out, but we just can’t shove one more meeting into our schedules.

So, what’s a busy mom to do? 

Introducing:   Chasing Superwoman’s online book club.  (Click the link to register.)

Why is an online book club the answer?  Well, to start, it’s completely and totally flexible.  You can participate around your schedule.  I just finished the discussion questions last week, and my friend Ann has already loaded questions for the first four chapters onto her site.  You just have to sign up!  Better yet – it’s free!

If you’re afraid of commitment, don’t worry.  There’s no pressure here to show up or read ahead.  You simply comment and join the discussion -- when it’s convenient. 

Are you a book club drop-out?  If so, you’re in good company.  We’ll officially kick off the discussion the week of July 11, so there's plenty of time to join us.

Many thanks to Ann and Light The World for sponsoring the online book club!  (I can’t even take any credit for the idea – thanks, Ann.)

Tuesday Tip: Talk To Strangers

I’m always telling my kids, don’t talk to strangers!  After all, strangers are dangerous.  Strangers can hurt you.  Strangers can invade your privacy and steal your identity.

The problem with my advice?  I’m not a very good role model.  My kids are always asking me, “Mom, why do you talk to strangers?”

It’s a fair question.  Besides the obvious answer -- I’m a grown woman and am entitled to live by a different set of rules than my young children – the real answer is simple:  I don’t want to miss out on divine appointments.

Have you ever met the right person at the right time?  Some meetings are more than coincidence.  And according to the book of Hebrews, some of those strangers out there happen to be angels.  “Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.”  (Hebrews 13:2)

I don’t know if I’ve ever entertained an angel.  These days, nothing would surprise me.

A couple of months ago, I was delayed in the Cincinnati airport.  You guessed it, I met a stranger.  Ann and I started talking, one thing led to another, and we found we had met for a reason. 

Ann is an IT specialist who builds online, interactive studies and book clubs for churches and ministry groups.  She was looking for writing content.

I explained to Ann that I was writing a faith-based book about my journey as a working mother.  I was looking for creative vehicles to promote the book.

Ann and I didn’t know we were looking for each other.  But God knew.  And I’m thrilled to say that Ann has inspired me to develop discussion questions for the book – questions that will be used in Ann’s online, interactive book club.  Check out her website – Light the World.  The online book club will launch in the coming weeks (and I’ll have a chance to interact with my readers)!

Sometimes, it pays to talk to strangers. 

Have you ever had a divine appointment? 

Chasing Superwoman Radio Debut

Today, we’ll be launching a few radio interviews for Chasing Superwoman. 

Join me at the following times and stations (EST):

7:20 a.m.:  WCBQ 1340 AM/WHNC 890 AM (Oxford, NC)

10:00 a.m (9:00 Central).:  KSBJ 89.3 FM (Houston, Galveston, Brenham, TX)

11:00 p.m.:  WNPQ 95.9 FM (Akron, Ohio)

Sure, I’m both excited and nervous.  By the time most of you read this, I’ll be through the first interview (or two).  I have to admit, while I love to talk to strangers, I can’t stand the sound of my own voice!

Think back to the first time you heard a recording of your own voice.  Mine was back in the day of tape recorders – I was about 8 years old.  I turned to my sister and said, “Is that really what I sound like?”

“Exactly,” she replied.

Surely, the Mickey Mouse voice on the tape recorder couldn’t be my voice?  Could it? 

During middle school, my speech teacher didn’t like my voice either.  He told me I had a wonderful presence, but I should never go into media.  The reason?  “You don’t have the voice for it.”

Well, I still don’t like the sound of my voice.  But it’s the only voice I have.  And it’s the voice that God gave me.  So I’m going to use it!

Do you like the sound of your own voice?  Does anyone?

* * * *
Stay tuned for additional radio and TV interviews this week:

Tuesday:  Noon WKTO 88.7 FM (Daytona Beach, FL)

Wednesday:  9:40 a.m. (7:40 a.m. Mountain) KDAZ 730 AM  (Albuquerque, NM)

Friday: 12:15 p.m. WCMH-TV, Channel 4 (Columbus, OH NBC affiliate)

Ten Ways To Help Promote Chasing Superwoman

I'm blessed with friends and family who want to help.  They don’t blog, and they know nothing about the publishing process.  But they really want to get involved in promoting Chasing Superwoman.  After all, they’ve lived this journey with me.  In addition, I’ve met lots of great bloggers and have even gotten emails from complete strangers who want to get involved.

First and foremost, you can’t believe how grateful I am for the support.  Thanks for asking.  I’m one of those people who is reluctant to ask for help, but the truth is, I really need all of you.

So, if you want to be involved, here are 10 things to consider (and please take all of this with a grain of salt – I’m a first-time author, remember?):

1.  Keep reading.  Thanks for reading.  I’ll try to put updates about my marketing activities, book signings, and other events right here on the blog. 

2.  Tell your friends.  Please tell your friends about Chasing Superwoman.  Send them a link to the blog, Amazon, or any other site (such as Scribd.com where they can read the first chapter online).

3.  Do a review on Amazon.  If you decide to buy the book on Amazon, please write a review.  Your words are powerful!

4.  Ask your local bookstore to order or stock.  Ask your local bookstore to order or stock Chasing Superwoman.   I’ll be circulating a list of stores who will carry copies, such as Borders and Family Christian Stores.  In fact, we’re doing a book-signing at Borders on July 11, from 3:00 – 5:00 p.m..  Please join us! (Columbus, Ohio – Henderson Road location.)

5.  Send me a list of your friends and influencers.  If you don’t know what to say (or don’t have the time or energy), please send me a list of your friends and contacts who may be interested in hearing more about Chasing Superwoman.

6.  Give me feedback.  Please give me your feedback about the blog, the book, or anything else.  For example, I have a friend who reads the blog every morning to help me catch typos – and I buy him lunch for every typo he catches!

7.  Join the blog tour.  My publisher will be organizing a blog tour next month.  If you’re a blogger and you want to get involved, please let me know and I’ll send you the details. 

8.  Become a Facebook Fan or a Blog Follower.  You can become a Fan right on Facebook.  And I just added a “Follower” button to my blog last week, so you can publically support and flow the blog.

9.  Suggest new material.  I’m going to keep writing.  So if you have ideas for new material, let me know.  My post later this week Are Showers Overrated? is actually at the request of my sister!

10.  Pray.  Please don’t feel like you have to do anything to support me.  But if I can ask for one thing (pretty please), I’d really appreciate your prayers.  The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. James 5:16 (NLT)

Thanks for everything.  June 1 is next week!