Last week, I got a call from a friend who had just lost his job. I’ll call him Bob. I’m really worried about him.
I’ve had friends lose their jobs before – between lay-offs, terminations, and down-sizings – but this was different.
Bob got blind-sighted. And Bob lived for his job.
In fact, Bob gave up everything for his job. His hobbies. His marriage. Even his health. So you can imagine his state of utter and complete panic when he called to tell me he had just been fired. What was I supposed to say?
Bob, I tried to tell you a year ago that your job was sucking the life out of you.
Bob, maybe you should get on your hands and knees and beg your wife to take you back.
Bob, I’m sure this all happened for a reason. I’ll be praying for you.
Bob, you need to file a lawsuit. I’ll find you a lawyer.
I just couldn’t find the right words. So I listened.
Bob used to go to church on a regular basis, but I’m not real sure where his spiritual life is headed these days. I hope and pray that his new-found circumstances will get him thinking. What’s important? What am I living for? Is a job worth risking everything?
I still worry about Bob.
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9 comments:
Not sure if you live in California or not...but I know more "Bob's" out here than I can count.
So very said, isn't it?
One thing I'm sure of: he is not alone. So many people in this boat these days-- they all need our prayers. And how wonderful that you could be a listening ear for him.
Your heart for Bob and his loss is beautiful.
I love that you decided to listen.
In my greatest times of grief I still remember those who just listened and sadly some who talked and said things I didn't need to hear.
~ Wendy
Listening can be hard and I'm frankly not very good at it (it's easier for me to talk).
And although I didn't include this in the post, I look at Bob (he's really a pretty good guy) and I also realize I could be just like him if I let my priorities get out of whack. And that scares me too.
Susan, Bob is fortunate to have a friend like you, one who will listen. I've been told that when presented a problem by someone else, men try to solve it, women listen sympathetically. I know that's the way I'm wired. And we can't always solve the problems of others. In most cases, the solution has to start within them. You did the right things: offer a sympathetic ear, express concern and support, and pray.
Thanks for sharing.
All you can do is pray for someone like this. And hope that this is the wake-up call he needs.
Bob sounds a lot like my husband--who has wrapped his whole life around his work. And, when the economy turned down, he felt like a total failure. It's resulted in depression, irrational (self-destructive) behavior and has truly risked the stability of our marriage and family. It's been a real test for me, too.
I, too, warned him about putting everything in the office, with no balance, and it's hit him hard. It just takes time and I think you should continue to be kind and listen, but don't fail as the voice of reason. You can do that without "I told you so". He'll know.
praying for bob...and you, susan!
"Just" listening doesn't seem like much, but it really is, Michelle. So is praying.
I automatically want to "fix" - make things better, offer advice. I'm learning sometimes I just need to be a sounding board.
I say keep listening, keep praying.
Saw your comment on my post on Stephanie's blog--thanks for your encouragement.
Popped in, although I'm supposed to be off line today(smile)..but wanted to take a few minutes to visit. I enjoyed reading a few things on your blog and visiting with you.
I know a few "Bobs" and I said a prayer for the Bob you know. I pray that this season of his life will find him drawing extra close to the LORD and finding that all he needs is in Him. I also pray for a new job for him.
It's a blessing that you LISTENED attentively. At times that's really what we need. Often, people want to give all the answers but truth is only the LORD has the answers. We can, and should, give prayer and comfort and encouragement to each other. I'm sure Bob is thankful he had yours.
Blessings to you! Happy Thanksgiving!
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